A         D                 E 
MAYBE YOU THOUGHT I WAS THE PACKARD 
              C#m    B 
GOOSE 
       A      D 
OR THE RONALD MCDONALD OF THE 
E                     C#m   B 
NOUVEAU-ABSTRUSE 
          A                       D                      E 
WELL FUCK ALL THEM PEOPLE, I DON'T NEED 
           A             G      D     E 
NO EXCUSE FOR BEING WHAT I AM 
C#m              B 
DO YOU HEAR ME, THEM? 
                 A                       D 
ALL THEM ROCK 'N' ROLL WRITERS IS THE 
E                      A   B 
WORST KIND OF SLEEZE 
              A                      D 
SELLING PUNK LIKE SOME NEW KIND OF 
E                            A   B 
ENGLISH DISEASE 
                       A                  D 
IS THAT THEM WAVE OF THE FUTURE 
G    D              E 
AW, SPARE ME PLEASE 
 
C#m         B    (CHORD SET 1) 
OH NO YOU GOTTA GO 
C#m                  B 
WHO DO YOU WRITE FOR,I WANNA KNOW 
   A           B         C#m 
I BELIEVE YOU IS THE GOVERNMENT'S 
WHORE 
F# 
AND KEEPING PEOPLES DUMB IS WHERE 
A 
YOU'RE COMING FROM 
(TWICE) 
 
A                        D                           E 
FUCK ALL THEM WRITER WITH THE PEN IN 
                              C#m   B 
THEIR HAND 
            A               D                       E 
I WILL BE MORE SPECIFIC SO THEY MIGHT 
                               C#m    B 
 UNDERSTAND 
                    A               D 
THEY CAN ALL KISS MY ASS 
        E                           A 
BUT BECAUSE IT'S SO GRAND 
         G                D      E 
THEY BEST JUST STAY AWAY, HEY, HEY, 
HEY. 
 
(CHORD SET 1) 
HEY JOE WHO DID YOU BLOW? 
MOE PUSHED THE BUTTON BOY 
AND YOU WENT TO THE SHOW 
BETTER SUCK A LITTLE HARDER OR THE 
SHEKELS WONT FLOW 
AND I DON'T MEAN YOU THUMB 
SO ON YOUR KNEES YOU BUM 
JUST TELL YOURSELF IT'S YUM 
AND SUCK IT TILL ITS NUMB 
 
F# 
JOURNALISM'S KINDA SCARY 
A 
AND OF IT WE SHOULD BE WARY 
F# 
WONDER WHAT BECAME OF MARY? 
A etc. . . 
HI! IT'S ME. THE GIRL FROM THE BUS 
REMEMBER THE LAST TOUR, WELL 
INFORMATION IS NOT KNOWLEDGE 
WISDOM IS NOT TRUTH 
TRUTH IS NOT BEAUTY 
BEAUTY IS NOT LOVE 
LOVE IS NOT MUSIC 
MUSIC IS THE BEST 
WISDOM IS THE DOMAIN OF THE WIZ 
WHICH IS EXTINCT 
BEAUTY IS A FRENCH PHONETIC 
CORRUPTION 
OF A SHORT CLOTH NECK ORNAMENT 
CURRENTLY IN RESURGENCE 
 
     A                D                       E 
IF YOUR IN THE AUDIENCE AND LIKE WHAT 
              C#m   B 
WE DO 
               A                    D 
WELL WE WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT WE 
E                                 C#m  B 
LIKE YOU ALL TOO 
        A                D                           E 
BUT AS FOR THE SUCKER WHO WILL WRITE 
       C#m 
THE REVIEW 
 
E      C#m     A       B    etc, etc... 
IF HIS MIND IS PREHENSILE 
HE'LL PUT DOWN HIS PENCIL 
AND HAVE HIMSELF A SQUAT 
ON THE COSMIC UTENSIL 
GIVE IT ALL YOU GOT 
ON THE COSMIC UTENSIL 
SIT AND SPIN UNTIL YOU ROT 
ON THE COMIC UTENSIL 
HE REALLY NEEDS TO SQUAT 
ON THE COSMIC UTENSIL 
 
NOW THAT I GOT THAT OVER WITH 
ILL JUST PLAY MY IMAGINARY GUITAR 
AGAIN 
 
submited by 
Will Kaemmerling 
merck@svpal.org