The Professor (Live at Cornucopia Café, Dublin) 

capo 3 
             C 
Well I don't know if I'm wrong  
            B/A  
Cause she's only just gone  
Am                     G  
   Here's to another relationship  
(hammers on 2nd fret of D string on the word "bombed") 
          F                  (Em) 
Bombed by excellent breed of gamete disease 
    F                        G 
I'm sure when I'm older I'll know what that means 
(same as first time) 
Cried when she should and she laughed when she could 
Here's to the man with his face in the mud  
And an overcast play just taken away  
From the lover's in love at the centre of stage yeah 
F 
Loving is fine if you have plenty of time 
    G 
For walking on stilts at the edge of your mind 
F 
Loving is good if your dick's made of wood  
        G 
And the dick left inside only half understood her 
Fmaj7 
What makes her come and what makes her stay?  
G6 
  What make the animal run, run away yeah 
Fmaj7 
What makes him stall, what makes him stand 
    G6 
And what shakes the elephant now 
    (mute) 
And what makes a man? 
Fmaj7         G6            Am6/9 (?) 
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know 
Am6/9 G6   Fmaj7 G6     C 
No I don't know you any more 
C Cmaj7 Fmaj7 
No, no, no, no... 
C           Fmaj7 
ooh yeah... hey hey... 

same as first time, except sub E7 for B/A  

I don't know if I'm wrong 
'Cause shes only just gone 
Why the *** is this day taking so long 
I was a lover of time and once she was mine 
I was a lover indeed, I was covered in weed  
Cried when she should and she laughed when she could 
Well closer to god is the one who's in love  
And I walk away cause I can 
Too many options may kill a man 
Loving is fine if it's not in your mind 
But I've ***ed it up now, too many times 
Loving is good if it's not understood 
Yeah, but I'm the professor  
And feel that I should know 
What makes her come and what makes her stay? 
What make the animal run, run away and 
What makes him tick apart from him prick  
And the lonelier side of the jealousy stick 
I don't know, I don't know, I don't know 
No I don't know, I don't know, I don't know 
No I don't know, I don't know, I don't know 
Hell I don't know you any more 
No, no, no no... 

Well I don't know if I'm wrong 
'Cause she's only just gone  
Here's to another relationship  
Bombed by my excellent breed of gamete disease 
I finished it off with some French wine and cheese 

La fille danse 
Quand elle joue avec moi 
Et je pense que je l'aime des fois 
Le silence, n'ose pas dis-donc 
Quand on est ensemble 
Mettre les mots 
Sur la petite dodo