Cm7  F  Cm7  F 

Bb            Adim           D7 
   You should stay away from roses 
       Gm          F#dim          Cm7 
And be careful to avoid chocolate hearts 
             Ebm    D7     Cm 
Keep distant from romantic notions 
       Cm7          F         Cm7   F 
‘cause that's where love most often starts 

Be sure to steer clear of diamonds 
And mink coats are most certainly out too 
For if she goes in for that kind of thing 
She just might fall then what you will do 

    Fm7                         G 
You know you've always been the sort 
      Ebmaj7                 Fm 
Who's truly only fond of the sport 
    Ebm       Bb7 
And who would never be satisfied 
  Ebm        Bb7 
Reclining in slippers by the fireside 
       F#              F#7 
With a wife's constant nagging 
    E                        A 
For things that you can't provide 
    Abdim             C#7 
Who no longer bears resemblance 
        F#m         E 
To that soft spoken flower 
            E7                         D   D/C#  B7 
You were so desperate to have for your bride 

         Cm7               F 
Too much conversing with a woman 
         Cm7          F 
Tends to dull a man's wit 

Never be taken in by poets 
Who claim that love if it's pure will never fade 
Though love may last all right in a bibliotheque 
In the real world, man, it's too easily unmade 

So don't take your freedom for granted 
Don't let curiosity take you for a ride 
As years drag on when you wake up next to her 
You'll wish that in your sleep you had died 
You'll wish you had died 

Cm7  F   Gdim  Bb