Santa Tax

Intro 
Dmaj7   A/C#   Bm7   Gmaj7 

Intro 
Dmaj7 
The calendar flipped, the leaves turned to brown, 
A/C# 
And suddenly Santa came to town. 
Bm7 
But before the goodwill, the carols, the cheer, 
Gmaj7 
There's a list full of names, and a wallet full of fear. 
Dmaj7 
Every cousin, every neighbor, every friend, 
A/C# 
When does the obligation ever end? 
Bm7 
Searching for that perfect thing, the one I know they'll prize, 
Gmaj7 
But I've got two weeks left and tears in my eyes. 


[Verso 1]
 
Dmaj7 
Is a gift card lazy? Is a handmade gift cheap? 
A/C# 
I just want to buy them something they can keep. 
Bm7 
But the prices are climbing, the sales are all a scam, 
Gmaj7 
Just one more item for the credit card slam. 
 


[Pré-Refrão]
 
Bm7 
It's the most stressful time of the year, 
Gmaj7 
When I spend all my money just to show I care. 
Dmaj7 
Paying the Santa Tax to the holiday debt, 
A7 
'Cause I still haven't finished, and I'm not ready yet! 
Bm7 
Oh, the Santa Tax, the Santa Tax, 
Gmaj7 
Fighting all the crowds until my spirit cracks. 
Dmaj7 
It's just the seasonal fee for a little Christmas cheer, 
A7 
A costly burden for the ones we hold so dear. 
 


[Refrão]
 
Bm7 
Parked three blocks out by the grocery store sign, 
Gmaj7 
To stand in a returns line that wraps all the way behind. 
Dmaj7 
Elbowing strangers for the last video game, 
A7 
It's not goodwill toward men, it's a frantic, stressed-out game. 
Bm7 
The aisles are a mess, the temperature's too hot, 
Gmaj7 
I just want to find the sweater that they said they hadn't got. 
Dmaj7 
My mind is overloaded, decision-making fails, 
A7 
I'm blinded by the sparkle of the ten-for-one sales. 
 


[Verso 2]
 
Dmaj7 
Is a gift card lazy? Is a handmade gift cheap? 
A/C# 
I just want to buy them something they can keep. 
Bm7 
But the prices are climbing, the sales are all a scam, 
Gmaj7 
Just one more item for the credit card slam. 
 


[Pré-Refrão]
 
Bm7 
It's the most stressful time of the year, 
Gmaj7 
When I spend all my money just to show I care. 
Dmaj7 
Paying the Santa Tax to the holiday debt, 
A7 
'Cause I still haven't finished, and I'm not ready yet! 
Bm7 
Oh, the Santa Tax, the Santa Tax, 
Gmaj7 
Fighting all the crowds until my spirit cracks. 
Dmaj7 
It's just the seasonal fee for a little Christmas cheer, 
A7 
A costly burden for the ones we hold so dear. 
 


[Ponte]
 
Em7 
I ordered it online with only six days left, 
Bm7 
The tracking information leaves me quite bereft. 
Gmaj7 
It says "Processing, delayed, pending in a far-off town," 
A7 
If it's late for Christmas morning, my whole world will fall down! 
Em7 
The wrong size, the wrong color, the item that's out of stock, 
Bm7 
I should have just put cash right in a simple little sock. 

Final Chorus 
Bm7 
It's the most stressful time of the year, 
Gmaj7 
When I spend all my money just to show I care. 
Dmaj7 
Paying the Santa Tax to the holiday debt, 
A7 
'Cause I still haven't finished, and I'm not ready yet! 
Bm7 
Oh, the Santa Tax, the Santa Tax, 
Gmaj7 
Fighting all the crowds until my spirit cracks. 
Dmaj7 
It's just the seasonal fee for a little Christmas cheer, 
A7 
A costly burden for the ones we hold so dear.