C 
It was raining. It was cold 
F 
West Bethlehem was no place for a twelve year old 
G 
So he packed his bags and he headed out 
                     C 
To find out what the world's about 
C 
He went to France, he went to Spain 
F 
He found love, he found pain 
G 
He found stores so he started to shop 
                                                C 
But he had no money so he got in trouble with a cop 

C 
Kids in trouble with the cops from Israel didn't have no home 
F 
So he cut his hair and moved to Rome 
G 
It was there he met his Irish bride 
                                                   C 
And they rented a flat on the lower east side of Rome...  
F 
Italy that is 
G 
Music publishers, book binders, bible belters, money changers, 
                                  C 
spoon bender, and lots of pretty Italian chicks 

C 
Charley bought some popcorn 
F 
Billy bought a car 
G 
Someone almost bought the farm 
                         C 
But they didn't go that far 
C 
Things shut down at midnight 
F 
At least around here they do 
G 
Cause we all reside down the block 
                 C 
Inside at ....23 Skidoo 

Wine was flowing so were beers 
So Jesus found his missing years 
He went to a dance and said "This don't move me" 
He hiked up his pants and he went to a movie 
On his thirteenth birthday he saw "Rebel without a Cause" 
He went straight on home and invented Santa Claus 
Who gave him a gift and he responded in kind 
He gave the gift of love and went out of his mind 

You see him and the wife wasn't getting along 
So he took out his guitar and he wrote a song 
Called "The Dove of Love Fell Off the Perch" 
But he couldn't get divorced in the Catholic Church 
At least not back then anyhow 
Jesus was a good guy he didn't need this shit 
So he took a pill with a Coca-Cola and he swallowed it. 
He discovered the Beatles 
And he recorded with the Stones 
Once He even opened up a three-way package for old George Jones 

Charley bought some popcorn 
Billy bought a car 
Someone almost bought the farm 
But they didn't go that far 
Things shut down at midnight 
At least around here they do 
Cause we all reside down the block 
Inside at ....23 Skidoo. 

The years passed by like sweet little days 
With babies crying pork chops and beaujolais 
When he woke up he was seventeen 
The world was angry. The world was mean. 
Why the man down the street and the kid on the stoop 
All agreed that life stank. All the world smelled like poop 
Baby poop that is ..the worst kind 

So he grew his hair long and thew away his comb 
And headed back to Jerusalem to find Mom, Dad and home 
But when he got there the cupboard was bare 
Except for an old black man with a fishing rod  
He said "Whatcha gonna be when you grow up?" 
Jesus said "God" 
Oh my God, what have I gotten myself into? 
I'm a human corkscrew and all my wine is blood 
They're gonna kill me Mama. They don't like me Bud. 

So Jesus went to Heaven and he went there awful quick 
All them people killed him and he wasn't even sick 
So come and gather around me my contemporary peers 
And I'll tell you all the story of 
Jesus...The Missing Years 

Charley bought some popcorn 
Billy bought a car 
Someone almost bought the farm 
But they didn't go that far 
Things shut down at midnight 
At least around here they do 
Cause we all reside down the block 
Inside at ....23 Skidoo. 
We all reside down the block 
Inside at ....23 Skidoo