Key of A 
           
Well, the (A) church burned down and no one knew 
What (D) Penecost Baptist was gonna do  
The (A) Sunday brimstom got so dadgum hot 
In burned (E) up a church bus in the parkin' lot 
In a (A) panick the reverend Dr. White 
Called (D) up an ex-member than hadn't lived right 
He owned (A) Joe's beer joint right across the fence 
It's the (E) same Joe's he'd preached against 
 
He said I (A) don't really want to be a hipocrit 
I got a (D) Sunday school class that's about to shit 
We're all (A) excited about revival week 
And (E) moved by the spirit so to speak 
With all the (A) souls we saved and the money we spent 
We (D) thought God told us to sell that tent 
I got a (A) famous evangilist supposed to come 
And done (E) run out of chairs, will you loan us some? 
 
Joe says (A) hell you can just use the whole dang place 
A9    on the jukebox "Amazing Grace" 
I ain't (A) supposed to open because of them blue laws 
But we'll (E) open tonight if it's allright with y'all 
Preacher said (A) well I reckon that'd be OK 
The (D) good Lord works in mysterious ways 
I was gonna (A) talk about Joshua, Judges and Ruth 
And I (E) reckon I can do it from the DJ booth 
 
At the (A) First Baptist Bar and Grill 
It's the (D) only church in the bible belt that (E) smells like a whisky still 
When the (A) sinners finish one more round 
(C) We'll have dinner on the ground 
And (A) go inside and hell, (E) pray we don't get (A) killed 
 
Key Change (move all chords up 1/2 step; A#, C#, and D#) 
 
The evangilist came with a well-dressed choir 
They showed up around happy hour 
Looked around the joint and didn't take it real well 
said the White ministry has gone to hell 
Ms. Mills that taught youth Sunday school 
And two deacons in the back room shootin' pool 
Were sharin' the Lord with a Jim Beam rep 
Who was teachin' Ms. Mills some line dance steps 
 
Reverend White was readin' from the book of Luke 
To a tall, drunk trucker about to puke 
He had John 3:16 memorized  
Tryin' to dried him out to get him baptised 
The evangilist yelled about the lights and the beer 
Said White you can't save any souls in here 
This place ain't nothin' but a den of sin 
Ain't the kind of place Baptists ought to be in 
 
Preacher said well we don't really need y'all here 
You didn't do a very good job last year 
Only saved one sinner, that's Todd McGuire  
And he's the little son of a bitch that set my church on fire 
Joe's beer joint has done been revived 
Only been here an hour and I done saved five. 
Sure it's got mirrors and a big dance floor 
But I finally found the flock God called me for. 
 
At the (A#) First Baptist Bar and Grill 
It's the (D#) only church in the bible belt that (F) smells like a whisky still 
Not a (A#) stained glass window anywhere in site, 
Just a (D#) blood-stained floor and neon lights, 
And the (A#) communion wine in (F) here is always (A#) chilled. 
 
We're here every Sunday;  We're livin' large;  
We're the only church with a cover charge. 
And if you don't like our doctrine and think we ain't devout, 
We'll have our bouncer throw your butt out ... 
Of the First Baptist Bar and Grill